Our Manifesto, The One You Care About

Our manifesto, like that of the other political party in this 2 horse race, is readily available. Crime, transport? Bah! I’ll tell you the things that show you why the Alliance is YOUR political party.

  • FREE blogs for all citizens of the country. The United National Congress Alliance government will make it that every citizen of the country will have a blog for free. We will subsidize the major cost.
  • FREE email address. We will make it that every citizen will have a free email address with a whopping 2MB storage space!
  • Marijuana will be legalized, meaning the fellas on the block can come out without fear to sell, as they help the economy.
  • Anil Roberts will be publicly muzzled. No longer will the people of Trinidad and Tobago have to be subjected to the loudness and nonsense spoken by Anil Roberts. It will be illegal to be Anil Roberts, and as punishment, he will have to listen to a recording of himself on Power 102 wherever he goes thanks to a chip implanted in his brain. Also, he will be forced to wear a hairpiece, so as to reduce glare, which has caused many an accident on the highways.
  • Purple band maxis will be implemented, going direct routes to beaches, malls and bars. As insisted upon by Kamla.
  • Sprangalang will be forced to shower.
  • The National Anthem will be rewritten, and performed by Richie Spice.
  • Emperor Patrick Manning will be moved to the Emperor Valley Zoo.
  • FREE hops bread for all!
  • Free Hooked On Phonics Systems; the success of such systems can be seen by Jack Warner.
  • While crime will be dealt with, other pressing issues will be as well – WE promise to find out what Gillian Lucky really is.
  • We will also figure out why and at what point Hulsie came back.
  • Morgan Job will be relegated to a museum as it is our duty to help the people of today and tomorrow understand where we came from by showing a living specimen of the link between ape and man
  • FREE bags of rice to everyone; it’s pre soaked and salted, and well aged;
  • FREE baliser for all! In an effort to lower our expenditure, we are going to stop the production of toilet paper, but we still need to wipe our asses.
  • NEW sets for CNC 3 and that Jay Q character will be sent to do radio work from now on.
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3 Comments

Filed under Plans

3 responses to “Our Manifesto, The One You Care About

  1. Mamoo Patch

    Bas yuh know if you de publish die manifesto patios would ah only manage 3 seats again ah la 86

  2. good to know allyuh find the rice

  3. basdeopanday

    Yes we have! Glad you notice!

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