What Really Happened In South Africa

Well, I am back from South Africa. The trip was wonderful. It sometimes amazes me how we have the money to do all these ads, bring in foreign artistes, pay general campaign expenses and jet set to South Africa on a whim. Yes, I have some money coming that I managed to – ehm, save from when I was last in office, but Jack really came through. Jack’s pockets are as bottomless as Gillian Lucky is butch. Ramesh is not half the man Jack is.

As we touched down in Johannesburg that day, my hands firmly in Jack’s, I couldn’t help but feel overjoyed at the prospect of having Mr. Mandela over to Trinidad. He would be the winning piece to the puzzle enabling us to win the election. It’s all we needed. At the very least, I knew he would be much better than Sizzla. The meeting was a delight. Mr. Mandela complimented us much on what was going on in Trinidad. The overpass, the industrialization, etc. not to mention the football.

Interesting fact, he was overjoyed and very thankful I would put him in the banner for my blog. He said he wanted to start a blog of his own but figured he would observe me for a few more years before doing so. A wise choice that was, considering, without the proper training nobody would even know you had a blog. All the attention would just be on me. In case you forgot, Patrick Manning has a blog, not that you care.

When Jack started talking football, a perplexed look came upon the once exiled leader’s face. He couldn’t understand what he was saying and asked me if Jack was from the province of Limpopo where the education has been poor within recent years leading to the children raising themselves and relying on their own language consisting of grunts, the pelting of fecal matter and mimicking of noises picked up by the local animals. After informing him that Jack was with me and not on a humanitarian mission, I translated and Mr. Mandela was glad how things were coming along.

After a very verbose yet enjoyable discussion, Mr. Mandela begged us to take him to Trinidad to talk with all of you and tell you how the United National Congress Alliance would lead the way to a better T&T. But it was not to be.

I looked at Jack, giving me that twinkle in his eye that said to me we were thinking the same thing. “Mr. Mandela, I think it best if you stay here. Your ill health is more serious, but we will be more than happy to relay any messages you send to the people of Trinidad and Tobago.”

“I am concerned. I am very concerned.” chimed Jack, as we shook hands and ended our meeting.

Some tears were shed, but we did what we set out to do, discussed how we could bring unity to the people of Trinidad and Tobago. With one last plea to come with us, we left his excellency in high spirits.

With all this said and done, we would still like to bring in someone in the blog header. We are looking into the availability of actor Gerard Butler to come on the platform in costume.

It was a delight to chat with the myth, the legend, the man in my blog header, though a passing comment about liking Andrew Jennings sent shivers up Jack’s spine.



Filed under UNC

4 responses to “What Really Happened In South Africa

  1. basdeopanday

    I know. We cared for Nelson.

  2. Gillian

    damn bastards….

  3. Pingback: Some Advice For Patrick In Uganda « The Extra Secret Blog of Basdeo Panday

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